Monday, November 20, 2006

Thoughts and Ponderings

So far, this blog has just been my jottings on things God has shown me. When I think about what I want to post, I review some of the major struggles and victories I've had in my life. It's funny though; I've been ministered to just by considering these things again. I want to talk about some of the battles I've been in; hopefully, they will be encouraging to you too!

About a year ago, I had a powerful experience. It changed me and the way I interact with God. There was a minister at our church who was talking about Hannah and the sacred vow she made to God. The sermon culminated in the minster having us ask God for something that we'd been longing for and then, making a sacred vow to Him. Not a sort of quid pro quo type of arrangement, because there isn't anything with which we could bribe God. It was just to finally ask God for EXACTLY the thing we'd been wanting, the thing that we'd been longing for and too afraid to ask Him to give. Then dedicate something to Him to mark the occasion.

I asked God to take away the heavy darkness that was always resting on the top of my stomach. (I found out later that feeling was shame.) I dedicated the rest of my life to Him and doing whatever He led me to do. Then, as a congregation, we all praised God for hearing and fulfilling our requests.

The dark feeling? GONE! In an instant, that feeling was ripped away and in it's place, this wonderful, warm peace. I knew that God was on the inside of me, that He filled that place now, and I'd never feel like He was far from me again.

About three days later, I went to a Dave Duell meeting and God finished cleaning me out. God told Dave about something the doctor had diagnosed me with and Dave prayed for me. I'd never even considered getting prayer about it before that!! (A couple days later, I found out that medically the sickness was gone too!! There was no trace of the disease any more.) But through that prayer for healing, God healed other emotional wounds as well. That experience was so FREEING! I KNEW who God was. I KNEW He was happy with me, that He loved me, that He was a kind, gentle, joyful Father.

Even now, when I look back at those weeks, I still get this big smile on my face! I can still feel the joy and peace of that moment. I wasn't concerned with how I looked or what others thought about me. I just rested and let my Father minister His overwhelming love to me. What an amazing experience!

Still Smiling,


Sarah Barlow said...

WOW!!! Sam that is amazing!!! God is so good and faithful to do what he has said he would do! I'm excited to read your blog!! So glad you started one! Love you!

Samantha F. said...

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!! *Feels all mushy**

I love you too, Sarah! ^_^ Your chirky encouraging words brightened my day!

I'm glad you like the blog; it was a long thought over decision.

God has been VERY good to me. As I grow closer to Him and trust Him more and more, I get to see such cool things happen!