Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Sometimes I Think - We All Need SOMEBODY Sometimes

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down
And I do appreciate your being 'round
Help me get my feet back on the ground
Won't you please, please, help me?

When I was younger, so much younger than today
I never needed anybody's help in anyway
But now those days are gone and I'm not so self assured
And now I've found I changed my mind and opened up the doors
"Help!" by The Beatles All Rights Reserved

I've been roaming around, I was looking down at all I see
Painted faces fill the places I can't reach
You know that I could use somebody
You know that I could use somebody
"Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon All Rights Reserved

Dude, the world is a lonely, lonely place! Zowie. Facebook, Twitter, World of Warcraft, 2nd Life - all places where people can have a form of intimacy without any commitment, and honestly without any lasting fulfillment. I remember when I was young my dad told me this awful story (my dad had a penchant for horror stories) about some people who were shipwrecked on an island. They found some plants on the island that they began to eat just fill their stomachs and stay alive, but unfortunately for them, the plant they consumed had no nutritional value whatsoever. They starved to death on the island with full stomachs.

Shiver me timbers, right? >_< I feel like that is a parallel to what is happening today in day to day life. Everyone is stuffing themselves on interactions that don't challenge, have no lasting value to their soul, and aren't truly vulnerable with anyone.

Does anyone know the worst thing you've ever done? Is it someone you respect? Someone who loves you anyway? Do you have anyone in your life who knows everything about you, whose opinion really matters to you? Is there anyone in your world you trust more than yourself?

These were really hard questions for me. Difficult on so many levels. I was raised to keep myself to myself, to make sure that I didn't air any dirty laundry in public. Unfortunately the "public" was anyone outside of our immediate family. (My parents have since amended their opinion on this topic - my parents are great; always looking for the healthier path.) I wandered around feeling very lonely, very segregated, and I didn't know why.

I wish I could say that "POOF!", as soon as I got in a relationship with someone healthy and mature it was easy for me to share, and it felt great - but that is SOOOO NOT THE CASE! At first, it felt so incredibly awkward. I struggled with immense feelings of being a bother, a nuisance, a cry baby, a drama queen, and had a million and one reasons why the moment wasn't ideal for being vulnerable.

It was all lies, of course. My comfort zone was being challenged. My belief about my worth was being challenged. It was a very scary time, but also one of great growth and great breakthrough.

What if we all took the time to truly listen to at least one person today? What if we asked that someone who has stood out to us all this time, "How are you really doing?" and actually listened? Sometimes I think we want to make loving God and serving people into this big melodramatic thing that can't happen until we're in another country working with the starving and the dying. But guess what? People are starving and dying right here! You can save a life today by just being present with someone. But it will take risk, and it will take a willingness to be uncomfortable, even in familiar circumstances. Sometimes I think, it's these "small" things that mean the most.

"What use is it, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but he has no works? Can that faith save him? If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, "Go in peace, be warmed and be filled, " and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that? Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself." James 2:14-17